Twenty-five things I’ve learned over the last twenty-five years.
Wear your damn glasses, especially if you have astigmatism. Don’t make your eyesight worse just because the glasses doesn’t fit your aesthetic. Find glasses that fit your aesthetic!
Use your senses and appreciate the things around you. I didn’t stop to enjoy nature until I experienced my first snow when I moved to Ohio. I found myself stopping more and kicking the snow with my boots and it made me giggle, bringing just a little bit more joy.
Not everyone is here for your best interest. Trust your intuition when you feel like something is not right.
On the flip side, don’t think the worst of everyone. There are people that you will discover will be with you through thick and thin, but closing people out won’t allow you to discover who those people are.
Alcohol is not the key to a good time, and if people are pressuring you, then you are in the wrong place with the wrong people. It’s okay not to like alcohol, it’s okay to like the “fruity drinks” where you can barely taste the alcohol content, and it’s okay not to be in the mood for it at all.
It is not a good idea to play with nail polish for hours on end, the smell of it will eventually make you feel sick. Oh, and don’t let anyone tell you that you don’t need all the shades from all the brands of your favorite color. Options are vital.
Growth and development is a process that will take time and patience. If you’re going to invest in something, invest your time and invest your patience in being able to grow.
Age is but a number. Being an adult because you’re 18 does not mean you stop being your parents’ and grandparents’ baby – so allow them to smother you in love.
Don’t trap the inner child inside of you. Sometimes, we get caught up in the adult responsibilities and demands that we forget to allow ourselves to have wholesome contentment and happiness.
Never stop finding excitement or joy in the little things, especially when things are hard.
Stop washing your hair every damn day, it’s not good for the natural oils. Blessed be the creators of dry shampoo and overnight conditioner.
Learn about finances. Taxes, mortgage, investment, retirement, loans and APR. As scary as these words sounds, they are something you will have to face one day and it will be to you benefit to have even a little bit of knowledge about them.
Love comes when it does. You could have it all planned out and you can be set in being single and independent forever, but it shows up and changes your plans. When it happens, allow yourself to love and to be loved.
Be curious in everything. Engage in your wants to learn. Your brain/mind does not have a max capacity for you to stop being curious.
Something will have to “give” in order for you to say “yes” to other things (this is a Dr. Becky Crandall lesson). You can’t do everything, which means you have to be critical and choose wisely on what you want to do.
Speaking of giving up something… Don’t add another major in the middle of your third year of college while having 5 billion other commitments if you still want to get some sleep.
Don’t let society or norms define the value of the major or degree program you chose. Every single one of them has purpose or they wouldn’t exist. Plus, why de-value something you worked your A** off to earn?
Taking time to yourself to do the things you love (I.e. arts and crafts) is good for your mind. It’s taking a break and bringing yourself to ground level by simply enjoying what brings you joy and calm.
Discovering that you’re more introverted than extroverted (or vice versa) than you realized is okay. Sometimes, we shift in what our minds need. So even if you’re a social butterfly, it’s okay to feel drained after being around people for a period of time.
Physical distance is not separation or the end, it’s an opportunity to love harder.
Try not to pack a whole suitcase of school/art supplies that you’re going to take to fly on the plane. It’s really heavy, you’re going to end up asking for help to lift it, and the fees for the extra weight could have been used to just buy new school/art supplies.
Don’t forget to love the people around you, especially your parents/guardians. As you’re getting old and figuring out your life, also remember that they are getting old and figuring out theirs too.
Life pushes you, pulls you, sometimes beats you. It’s like things snowball with one thing right after the other happening. Learn to go with the flow and move with the waves; it makes the sudden changes a little less difficult.
You can’t do anything all on your own, and that’s okay. Asking or accepting help is not a sign of weakness nor is it losing your independence. You’re also not a burden. It is accepting love, care, and support that you deserve.
Accepting who are, all of you: the bests and the worts, is one of the most difficult processes to experience – especially when you are still in the process of learning who you are. There’s no reason to be afraid of the dark parts of you because that’s what made you the stronger, better parts of you.
Until next time,